What Do You Want To Be When You Grow Up?

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The infamous question, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” is a question that gets asked God only knows how many times.  The answers that I’ve had throughout the years are scattered all over the place.  When I was five, I wanted to be a vet – until I found out that they had to clean the animal’s butts.  As I started dance, I wanted to be a dance teacher.  Continuing dance, I wanted to be a Broadway dancer, then a Rockette, then a professional choreographer… all up until my knee fell apart (that’s a story for another blog).  Then I wanted to be a singer/songwriter, then a music producer… Leading to my current decision of journalist, preferably a sports journalist.

Yesterday I made my schedule for next semester; my final semester of college – and let me tell you – it’s getting real.  It’s a little scary knowing that after next semester I’ve got to come up with a game plan to start my career.  And as I try to get a game plan going, I’m asking myself that infamous question, “Kristina, what do you really want to be when you grow up?” I love writing, I’m told that I’m good at it.  I love sports, they make me happy.  And yet, here I am, questioning my career choice.

Last night, after a pep talk from my parents, I did some thinking.  I realized that the reason I’m questioning sports journalism as my career is because the things I hope to get from my career have changed; because, I’ve changed.

When I wanted to be a vet, I didn’t know what I wanted out of job, because let’s face it – my concept of what a job is at the age of five was probably not exactly up to par.  As I got older, I realized I wanted to do something I was really passionate about – that being dance. All I wanted from my career was just fun; I wanted to do something that was fun for me and that I was good at.  After my knee injury, being older, I took into account that I also want longevity from my career.  Hence, my transition into music production and music in general.  A part of me also wanted to pursue music because, I’m not going to lie, I wanted everyone to know who I was.  I wanted that fame, that celebrity lifestyle; I think mostly because of the struggles I had to overcome throughout junior high and high school.  At the time, the only way I thought you could become a known name was through the entertainment industry.  Getting older, I became a little more realistic.  Not to say that I couldn’t make it in the entertainment industry because I absolutely have that drive; but I figured if that was really my true calling, I would have been way more motivated with all of it.

So then my senior year of high school, applying for college, I reevaluated my life basically.  And I realized that I love writing and my main concern with a career was being able to do something that I loved.  Now, as a senior in college – soon to embark on my final semester, the once fun question becomes serious.  I still have the same concern, I want to be able to wake up every morning truly excited to go to work.  However, you do learn new things about yourself in college.  And for me, over the past four years, I’ve realized that I really want to make a difference in this world and influence change.  So that infamous question of, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” has turned into, “What are you going to do to make a difference?”

My goal in life is no longer to have a career with a superfluous salary (though, if it happens that way – I won’t complain), or have a career to simply become famous (even though I was voted most likely to be famous in high school), or do something that is simply just fun.  My career goal now reflects the growth I’ve made thus far in life.

So what do I want to be when I grow up?  Well, as I continue to grow up, I still want that career that makes me excited to go to work every morning.  But now, I realize I want to also wake up every morning with the potential to start change.  And as I write this blog, I realize that the best way that I, Kristina Konrad, can promote change is through writing.  As for what I’ll be writing, the medium I’ll be writing for… I guess I’ll have to sit back, ride it out, and see where this universe leads me.

What do you want to be when you grow up?

…What do I want to be when I grow up?  A happy person who makes a difference.

Final answer.

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The Nectar List

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My professor used the word nectar in a sentence in one of my classes today.  I had never heard the word nectar used in any other class but science, you know to describe a flower.  So, me being the English dork that I am, googled it.  Turns out, nectar is slang for “to live.”  As I googled though I came across something called, “The Nectar Lists.”  I was intrigued, read up on it, and feel the need to share it.

It’s sort of like a bucket list, but instead of acknowledging things that you want to do, it’s acknowledging things that you have already done that you feel are noteworthy.  I guess we could say it’s like the “nectar” in the flower of your life…? (I’ll even admit, that was super cheesy).  But, I think this is such a cool idea, and a great little pick me up to remind yourself that you are unique, accomplished, and that you ARE making moves.

As I made my list, I was hung up after number two.  I had two major accomplishments that came to mind, and then I really had to think about anything else.  Why is this?  Because I let little accomplishments fall to the side.  I didn’t think they mattered enough.  I think we are all guilty of this.

So, my message to all of you is to recognize all your accomplishments.  Any action you take to improve yourself, your life, or someone else’s life; despite how little it may seem, is actually a big deal.  I challenge all of you to make your own nectar list.

I’ll let you see just a snippet of my own…

1.  I’ve overcome being bullied and cyberbullied.

2.  I’ve stayed true to myself and my morals even though people tried to change me or squash my values.

3.  I graduated from High School and am in my final year of college.

4.  I have dance battled a stranger… and won.

5.  I have surprised the general public with something that I’ve said (just ask my parents, this happens often).

6.  I have made people laugh until they cried.

7.  I have mastered countless raps breaking any “white girl” stereotype (not to brag but some include Eminem’s “Rap God” and Busta Rhymes verse in “Look At Me Now”).

8.  I have been able to laugh at myself.

9.  I have moved people to tears with certain pieces that I’ve written.

10.  I’ve empowered someone.

So you see, any accomplishment, is still an accomplishment.  Note your successes.  Make that nectar list.  Applaud yourself.

RE2PECT

1600x700q80It has taken me this long to finally post about Derek Jeter, because I still cannot fathom that I will not see this man playing shortstop anymore…

Baseball has always been bigger than a game to me, and this man has always bee who I watched throughout the years.  Whether it be his positive attitude, his amazing skill, his strong work ethic, or his true respect for the game; the man has heart, and he’s definitely touched my heart.  So blessed to be able to say I went to countless games he’s played in, celebrated my sweet 16 in the legend seats behind the Yankee dugout just feet away from him, and was able to sit in on his final Q&A with Steiner Sports the same week as his last game.  But most of all, I’m blessed to have simply been alive to watch this man exemplify excellence; as an athlete and a person.

Thank you Captain, for always giving me something bigger to believe in.  Thank you Captain, for everything.